I was relaying the latest news on the family visit situation over the phone to a friend this afternoon.
She took me by surprise when she said "yeah, but really, your family is quite normal isn't it?"
Now, maybe it is. We all - pretty much - have jobs, houses, cars, etc. We all look normal to an unsuspecting world. We're all pretty liberal thinkers, no looney right dragging us down.
But then I thought I'd do a little analysis. this is what I came up with (some family members are mentioned more than once as they fall into several categories...) :
We are:
1 manic depressive
1 schizophrenic
1 person with terminal cancer
1 person with uncurable but not life threatening cancer
1 diabetic
3 attempted suicides
1 bulimic
1 anorexic
1 compulsive over-eater
1 gastric band
1 woman in a wig
1 formerly battered husband
1 lottery scratch card addict
1 epileptic
3 obsessive compulsives
2 Baptists
4 Buddhists
8 former Christadelphians
1 person who has voted tory
1 policeman
1 ex policewoman
1 topless model
1 extra marital affair that we don't talk about
2 excommunicated sisters
0 women with natural hair colour
1 soldier in Iraq
1 blogger
4 facebook addicts
And many, many big drinkers.
Is this what makes up a normal British family in the 21st century? Probably.
I'd like to think that we're nothing special.
Except for me of course.
I know that I'm special.
12 commentaires:
LOL Loved that, may be I should analyse my lot - be prepared
The night my nan died we were all in my mum's house waiting with my nan.
Some of us in the kitchen started making a "family tree" as I have 72 first cousins on that side of the family.
This quickly degenerated into a list of their labels... and we had quiet a similar find just on a larger scale! :)
Family Trees eh, always a fruit basket to be found.
Elf
I have a family tree going back and forwards for 9 generations
All these people... Its truly weird
Having said that Im not labelling mine
Though the one about natural hair colour is tempting
VM - i'll look forward to seeing that!
Elf, 'always a fruit basket to be found' - I love that!
Henry, label them, label them! it's more fun than you'd imagine!
Of course you are sweetie - of course.
The Tory voter cracked me up. I daren't do one for my family, it would be too frightening- I think just me on my own would fall into half your categories!!
I think your family sounds spectacularly normal compared to mine.
I dare not even start on mine. No, really ....
Aims, I know. I know. He he.
Daisy, I didn't say how many of them were me, did I?
12oti, you have my sympathies...
LaTanya, it's a cathartic process...he he.
No looney rights? As if THAT is the worst thing that could happen!
I think overall your list looks pretty normal. Really. Which would, of COURSE, make you extremely special!
Loved your list!!
If it's any consolation, my own family is far more dysfunctional than that - as evidenced by the following concrete proof.
Virtually everyone who has ever visited my blog has commented on how spectacularly fucked up I am. I'm a reformed alcoholic, borderline eating disorder, chaotic love life, appalling romantic history, kinkier than the proverbial bedspring...
Compared to the rest of my family, I am Charlotte from Sex and the City.
If that doesn't scare you, nothing will...
J x
Louise, I AM special and I'm glad you noticed, he he
Juliette, it doesn't scare me...makes me think we'd have a good night out together, he he.
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