lundi 30 mars 2009

We are family

I was relaying the latest news on the family visit situation over the phone to a friend this afternoon.

She took me by surprise when she said "yeah, but really, your family is quite normal isn't it?"

Now, maybe it is. We all - pretty much - have jobs, houses, cars, etc. We all look normal to an unsuspecting world. We're all pretty liberal thinkers, no looney right dragging us down.

But then I thought I'd do a little analysis. this is what I came up with (some family members are mentioned more than once as they fall into several categories...) :

We are:
1 manic depressive
1 schizophrenic
1 person with terminal cancer
1 person with uncurable but not life threatening cancer
1 diabetic
3 attempted suicides
1 bulimic
1 anorexic
1 compulsive over-eater
1 gastric band
1 woman in a wig
1 formerly battered husband
1 lottery scratch card addict
1 epileptic
3 obsessive compulsives
2 Baptists
4 Buddhists
8 former Christadelphians
1 person who has voted tory
1 policeman
1 ex policewoman
1 topless model
1 extra marital affair that we don't talk about
2 excommunicated sisters
0 women with natural hair colour
1 soldier in Iraq
1 blogger
4 facebook addicts

And many, many big drinkers.

Is this what makes up a normal British family in the 21st century? Probably.

I'd like to think that we're nothing special.

Except for me of course.

I know that I'm special.

12 commentaires:

Anonyme a dit…

LOL Loved that, may be I should analyse my lot - be prepared

Elfinamsterdam a dit…

The night my nan died we were all in my mum's house waiting with my nan.
Some of us in the kitchen started making a "family tree" as I have 72 first cousins on that side of the family.
This quickly degenerated into a list of their labels... and we had quiet a similar find just on a larger scale! :)

Family Trees eh, always a fruit basket to be found.

Elf

Henry North London 2.0 a dit…

I have a family tree going back and forwards for 9 generations

All these people... Its truly weird

Having said that Im not labelling mine

Though the one about natural hair colour is tempting

travelling, but not in love a dit…

VM - i'll look forward to seeing that!

Elf, 'always a fruit basket to be found' - I love that!

Henry, label them, label them! it's more fun than you'd imagine!

aims a dit…

Of course you are sweetie - of course.

Daisy a dit…

The Tory voter cracked me up. I daren't do one for my family, it would be too frightening- I think just me on my own would fall into half your categories!!

Anonyme a dit…

I think your family sounds spectacularly normal compared to mine.

Tony a dit…

I dare not even start on mine. No, really ....

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Aims, I know. I know. He he.

Daisy, I didn't say how many of them were me, did I?

12oti, you have my sympathies...

LaTanya, it's a cathartic process...he he.

Louise a dit…

No looney rights? As if THAT is the worst thing that could happen!

I think overall your list looks pretty normal. Really. Which would, of COURSE, make you extremely special!

Anonyme a dit…

Loved your list!!

If it's any consolation, my own family is far more dysfunctional than that - as evidenced by the following concrete proof.

Virtually everyone who has ever visited my blog has commented on how spectacularly fucked up I am. I'm a reformed alcoholic, borderline eating disorder, chaotic love life, appalling romantic history, kinkier than the proverbial bedspring...

Compared to the rest of my family, I am Charlotte from Sex and the City.

If that doesn't scare you, nothing will...

J x

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Louise, I AM special and I'm glad you noticed, he he

Juliette, it doesn't scare me...makes me think we'd have a good night out together, he he.