The thing with weddings is that everyone is looking pretty good and, usually, any singletons in the camp are looking for a bit of a wedding hook-up. Well, this is how I see it, anyway.
Alas, for the gayers amongst us, there's often very little chance of such wedding night bliss, unless you're willing to go for one of the cater-waiters or the guy who delivered the flowers. Occasionally there'll be another random 'mo in the room, but he's never what you'd hoped for.
And this wedding was no exception. Zero potential action for yours truly.
Well, that's a lie. There was a long lost cousin who had 'never had a girlfriend' but was yet to confirm which bus he was on. Having met him, I think he didn't need to confirm anything - he just needed his family to open their eyes a little. But hey, as gay as he was, he was no looker - not someone to make one's heart flutter. Not even a little.
There was also a very nice man in charge of the waiting staff - earlier in the day he said he'd 'show me his catering equipment' if I stuck around late enough (no lie, those were his words). Alas, I didn't see him at the end of the night - maybe he'd already left with Cousin It.
But just as I thought that all was without hope, lady luck shone her torch brightly in my face and woke me up again.
You see, one of the other guests was a guy that has always made me laugh. We've gotten on well the few times that we've seen each other - and although he's never said anything about being gay, I've definitely never seen him with a girl.
During the day, as the photo's and garden chitchat went on, he came to find me to gossip. I thought he was just bored, being on his own and without plus-one, just like me. When we sat together for dinner, he spent the meal giving me his full attention and even laughed at my crappy jokes.
When we went on the mini-train tour of the wedding venue (yes, it was big) he made sure that he sat next to me.
We drank buckets of champagne together during the evening, avoiding the dancefloor as much as possible. And then, as the night drew to an end, he came over to chat to me. He put his hand on my shoulder and leaned in.
"Great day eh?" he said.
"Yeah, really good" said I.
"I've really enjoyed myself, " he said and winked at me.
"Me too," I said. "It's been fun."
Then he grabbed my ass, kissed my cheek.
"I'll be coming to see you in Paris soon..." He said - and then he skipped off to get on the bus back to his hotel.
I know, it's not a lot to get excited about.
But hey, it made my day.