lundi 4 mai 2009

Teeth

So, I was chatting with Jersey last night and we decided it's all about the teeth.

We were stood at the bar enjoying a beer and watching the dancefloor. The bar in which we were drinking is famous for its Sunday 'middle eastern' evening - which basically means hot lebanese guys dancing to fabulous middle eastern disco music. The dancing is spectacular, as you'd imagine.

Anyway, in this hotbed of machismo and testosterone, it was obvious that the conversation would turn to which guys around us 'floated our boats' so to speak. We chatted to guys as they came and went from ordering drinks at the bar and we were frequently disappointed, nay horrified, by the surprises behind the smiles.

Often one of us would catch the eye of a handsome man, only for him to smile back at us with a mouthful of, well, disaster.

Bad teeth. Everywhere we turned were bad teeth.

Now, I'm English so I'm clearly not one to talk about the state of anyone's teeth, but as the evening drew on, we decided that teeth were actually a key deciding factor.

If a guy has bad hair, well it's kind of forgivable. Bad shoes - yeah, they can be changed. A hairy back? I quite like that. A bit of extra weight, no problem. But bad teeth? Eek!

We agreed that no matter how much he made us laugh, no matter how sexy he was or what he appeared to be, erm, packing, if he had bad teeth it would be a no. Sorry. Not tonight.

As we finished our drinks, we said goodbye to the bartender (good teeth, great arms) and headed off to the other bar. To the rendezvous point for the couple from the other night. We were being brave. We were feeling a little crazy too, but I think we were largely just egging each other on enough to go through with it. We waited for them to arrive.

We ordered a beer. And another. They didn't show.

We gave them until 11h30 and decided to go home. I guess they weren't feeling as brave as us. Nor as reckless, clearly.

Oh well.

It's been a long time since I was stood up.

I guess there's a lesson in there somewhere.

19 commentaires:

A Lewis a dit…

I thought "the eyes have it"?? No, wait...that's the "I's."

Henry North London a dit…

Tant pis

I was so looking forward to that too

Daryl a dit…

I bet they forgot ...

The Pixy Princess a dit…

Dammit! How great a post would THAT have been!
*sigh* I live vicariously through other people's blogs. Note to self: Get a life!

HAHAHAHAHAHA the word on the word verification is UNDRESS!!!

cb a dit…

welcome to MY world-- apart from the bad smiles of course.

Victor a dit…

they stood you up....

what's that saying about the cool light of day?

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Lewis, I think it might be the I's...you have a good point.

Henry, I kind of wasn't, so I'm not sad about it...

D, I bet they didn't. Who could forget a hot thing like me? eh? eh? What you saying? That I'm forgettable? he he

Pixy, sometimes I think the verification thing reads the blog too...

travelling, but not in love a dit…

CB - well I made up for it tonight. tra la la. Just saying is all...

Victor, it says lots about the cool light of day. i've never cared for that much, ha ha.

12ontheinside a dit…

I suppose it's wrong that I laughed at that. After all that build up, pffft. Maybe you had a lucky escape, they could have been really weird in a bad way.

The Mutant a dit…

Wait, you mean to tell me that somewhere in teh world is a bar with a 'middle eastern' night?

TAKE ME WITH YOU!

Teeth are a serious sticking point with me too, odd considering how much I hate my own teeth, you think I'd be slightly forgiving.

travelling, but not in love a dit…

12oti - I'm kind of happy about it in Vicotr's cool light of day. Not that i'm saying it wouldn't have been fun. he he...

Mutant - anytime you're in paris sweetie. It's a very funny evening - it feels like a Beirut nightclub in the 80's. Class. Pure class.

Brett a dit…

! ??? ! being straight and living in small town England reading your blog is like stepping through the looking glass, read the Saturday post first then scanned the others for the update, never has a blog post held so much expectation, and such a let down!!! Blogging of the highest order.

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Brett, I build you up to knock you down, I know. Sorry. I think most people are disappointed that it never happened...although the day that I start running my sex life around whether or not something is a good blog post is the day I need to get speccial help. Hmm....maybe I'm almost there, ha ha. x

conortje a dit…

I've just been catching up on your blog - I'm exhausted just reading about your life! Do you ever rest?

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Big C, you snooze, you lose...tee hee;

amy a dit…

Oh I knew there was something missing from my life last week - reading your blog!

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Amy, how on earth can I be the thing missing from your rock and roll lifestyle. C'est chez toi la vida loca, not me...surely?

aims a dit…

Eurghhh...bad teeth - no thank you!Eughhhh....gag......running to the bathroom now....thanks....

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Aims, I KNEW you'd understand where I was coming from...