My mood ring, that is. It's turning from a happy go lucky shade of pink, to a desperate, driven to the edge of madness shade of black.
Why? It's simple. I'm here in Chicago with 8 members of my family and they are driving me crazy. The fact that I ever agreed to come on this trip surprises me no end, but it hasn't all been bad.
I wouldn't have missed being here for the Obama rally for anything, but really - do we absolutely have to eat in the same chain restaurant 2 nights in a row? Am I really the only one who has any kind of a plan for the day - every day?
I'm stuck with an aunt who apologises for everything and who is constantly worried that someone is having a bad time; a mother who is largely bewildered by the whole experience and who can't decide whether or not she wants a cup of tea with her breakfast (I have to make the decision for her); a brother who is an absolute control freak and who only agrees to do things if he can be convinced that doing it was his idea; a cousin and husband who are lovely and are proving to be the saving grace; and a nephew and niece who play nicely with everyone else, but who like to beat shit out of me, their loving uncle.
You can imagine that I'm having a lovely time, can't you?
Today I left them to their own devices and headed off for a spot of retail therapy and time to myself. Calvin Klein and Kenneth Cole were both soothing my wounded soul when my cellphone rang.
"Hello son, it's me, Mom"
"What's happened?"
"We've just left the Gap and we're lost. How do we get home?". My Mother truly sounded like she was calling from beyond the edge of reason.
"Which branch of Gap is it?" I asked, not unreasonably.
"I don't know. There are a lot of tall buildings and a park".
Is it any wonder that my mood ring is black?
14 commentaires:
My advice to one and all would be: NEVER go on holidays with your family. Never even do something with them that requires an overnighter.
awww, how cute. my experience with my mom yesterday was teaching her what 'smileys' were while on google talk. she didn't understand how the program turned the typed symbols around and into real smiley faces. it took me a half an hour to explain. sigh. lol.
hehe sounds like you are going to need a holiday when you get back :-)
Don't you just love family holidays!
Take the battery out of your phone and claim it's just not working? Equip them with maps and tell them being lost is not a problem it's a challenge? Call in a personal organiser to take care of decisions like does your mum want tea with her breakfast?
Good luck, and you do know mood rings also react to temperature, right? ;)
family is enough to drive a sane man nuts...i can't imagine being with the lot of them in a foreign country...(today's verification word was CRONE, wtf?)
Do not do holidays with family and never with more than one friend.
Organise them - keep th eoldies close to home , banish eth control freak to museums and the family with kids to suitable exploits, then disappear and switch off the mobile
Did your luggage turn up
I had no idea this was a family trip. And EIGHT family members! I can only say I'm glad there have been some daving graces. I cannot imagine more than a couple in an 8-member-family-group of mine that I could tolerate days on end. And the SAME. CHAIN. restaurant too nights in a row?? You're in Chicago! That would have sent me over the edge.
More than a few hours with family!
*shudders and runs away screaming*
I'm not sure I'm reading all of this correctly TBNIL.
For some reason I thought your family might live in Chicago.
So when you wrote that they didn't know where they were....
On the other hand. If you are all visiting - well - erm......Uh......
Leave them NOW .. get on an airplane and fly to NYC and come up to Beacon NY with me tomorrow evening and spend Saturday with my friend Carter ... I am convinced you two would be the perfect couple........
:-Daryl
I had a mood ring once but it went off in a huff......
Good to see mothers are the same the world over ....... I thank God everyday that my family lives on the other side of the world :-)
LaTanya, oh how lucky you are. Mine is the other side of the Channel, but still too close for comfort....
Enregistrer un commentaire