My Mother sent me an email yesterday. Her church (baptist) had sent her an invitation to a cross-dressing party and she wondered if I'd be in the UK on that date because 'I hate going to these things alone - and I never know what to wear'.
I called my Mother to make sure I'd read her email correctly.
"How are you?"
"I'm just getting my bunnies out, hold on a minute," she replied.
"Oh you know, the bunnies, the Easter tree, the chickies, the eggs - I'm decorating the house for Easter".
When did we turn into a family who decorates the house for Easter? This is most odd.
"Your brother has finished his house already," she informed me. "It's decorated from top to bottom for Easter."
"But he's a buddhist." Apparently this held no sway with her. Apparently my brother's buddhism didn't stop him from sending his kids to a church school (protestant) so why should it stop him from celebrating that fact that Christ is risen.
Since I decided that a holy path wasn't for me, and worked out that being a good person was enough without necessarily having to believe in a greater power, Easter has really been about eggs, a long weekend off work and that's about it. And to be honest, I get very few eggs these days - which isn't a bad thing either.
But that said, any church that holds cross-dressing parties could be a church for me (as long as I don't have to believe in God). I wondered what the vicar would wear - he's quite a young hottie and would probably look good in a pair of hotpants and a halter neck top.
Alas, it's nothing as exciting. It's not the festival of transvestitism that I was hoping for.
Apparently every year they get a big old cross put up outside the church and they 'dress it up' - i.e. they cover it in flowers and plastic eggs and fluffy bunnies. The vicar's drag would have to wait for another occasion.
I declined her invitation to join in - I'm not going to be travelling to the UK again until the end of June.
"Well, never mind Bab," She said, obviously not really all that bothered, and clearly a little distracted. "Now, should the theme of my Easter table be bunnies or chicks?"
"I think it should be Jesus, Mom."
I mean really, if you're going to be religious, be religious.