mardi 29 avril 2008

A question of trust

I'm pissed off. But it's all my own fault.

"You told us you were going to write a blog when you moved to France" said brunette female colleague while we were out for dinner last week.

"I do write a blog" said I, "But it's not something I share with people"

"Why not?" asked blonde female colleague.

"Because it's about my life, and there are things in there that are incredibly personal and the anonymity allows me more freedom."

"OK, pass the mango chutney" said blonde female colleague, food once again finding it's usual place at the front of her thoughts.

We carry on eating, we drink some and drink some more.

Now, safely out of their way (me in Lyon, them in UK) I get an email....

"Please don't hate us, but we found your blog".

So, if my writing takes a turn for the prim, proper and less revealing, you know why.

They tell me that they are staying away but I fear the damage is done. It's going to take me a while to forget that people I know are reading what I'm writing.

Shit, sometimes I'm a dumbass - why did I tell them?

But hey, this isn't about my open-ness is it?

13 commentaires:

softinthehead a dit…

Know what you mean, I don't think I would want to be found out. Still don't become too prim, where's the fun in that!!

Lola a dit…

Bugger. Writing exactly what you want and letting fly when provoked is one of the things I envy about your blog.

My blog is assiduously read and enjoyed by my parents (who have been over here too). They think it is wonderful, because I never phone them and now they know a bit more about my life. I have thought about, and dismissed, the idea of writing two, one for them and one for everyone else.

My parents have told me that they suspect you are a homosexual person, by the way.

travelling, but not in love a dit…

softy, I'm not going to be prim. I've struck a deal with them. They won't read it and if they do read it, they promise to tell me that they don't.

I'm only fooling myself, but hey.

And Lola, there's no hiding anything from your parents, is there! They're very clever people, and intuitive too.

Damn, have I just outed myself?

Swearing Mother a dit…

Travelling, I felt exactly the same when I got pissed and told my son I'd got a blog and even the name of it too. Fancy a mother telling her son that she's writing a blog called Swearing Mother, and me using the "f" word every frigging minute, especially when for the last twenty or so years I've been giving them a hard time for anything remotely approaching swearing.

He loved it. I made him promise not to tell his sister. Now he can't be bothered to read it any more, so I have reverted back to type after losing my way a bit and watching what I said.

Still don't know how I'd feel about colleagues reading it though.

How did you get outed, blogwise? By the way, I also suspect you may be homosexual. :o)

Megan McGurk a dit…

Travelling, I feel your angst.
I HATE that people who know me read my blog because they all pretend that they don't and then it feels like they have power over me.
I wish I had kept my mouth shut when I was just starting out and was hungry for readership.

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Hey SM, I was outed by a combination of my big mouth saying i had a blog and by colleague's desparate commitment to spending half a day finding said blog. nuisances.

And yes, you are correct also. I do sleep with men. And I'm all the better for it.

Medbh, I knew you;d feel my pain. Thanks for that.

I've decided that if people aren't adult enough to control their clicker fingers then screw 'em - they'll read what they read....I'm big enough to deal.

aims a dit…

I would be bummed if you quit being you. And so would some other people I have turned on to you...

In the end people judge us even if we don't blog....so who gives a damn?

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Aims, CG - worry not, I don't think it's going to change anything to be honest.

And my BDF (Best Dutch Friend) said something to me last night and then looked very sheepish - it was something he'd only know about if he read these pages. So I'm probably kidding myself if I think this is truly incognito!

Let the blogging continue!

aims a dit…

Had another thought last night -

Remember what Oscar Wilde said -

The only thing worse than being talked about - is not being talked about.....

tornwordo a dit…

I tell all, well, except for current sex and drug use. My grandmother and parents read my blog, but I consciously refuse to let that influence what I write.

Stew a dit…

You sleep with men???

What?!

No!

travelling, but not in love a dit…

Aims, I agree with M. Wilde. He's absolutely correct on that one!

Tornwordo, I'm not going to worry too much about it - now that my anger has died down, I feel remarkably relaxed about it again...luckily!

Stew, sorry to dissappoint you. All I'll say is, not much sleeping goes on. On account of my snoring, mainly.

Lane Mathias a dit…

Oh I know what you mean. I've tried to remain 'incognito' becausee of a certain person, but there's always the doubt and in my case, it severely impinges on what can be written. Ho hum, pig's bum and all that.
Hope it doesn't effect your fabby blog too much:-)