vendredi 14 décembre 2007

Star Academy

So last night was the date with le Lyonnais. He cooked dinner for us both. And you know what? As I stood on his balcony, freezing but with a gin and tonic to keep me warm, I realised I was in the wrong place.

He's a nice guy, just not nice enough. Well, he probably is nice enough for someone else, but not me. What am I looking for? What was he lacking? If only I knew. I just know it wasn't right.

I ate my dinner, gave good company and got my coat. Years ago I'd have stayed, just for politeness' sake. But I didn't stay. I didn't want to, so I left. I know this probably sounds like a pretty simple decision, but trust me, it was hard. I knew the sex would be good. I also knew I'd hate myself the next day. And I knew he'd be more difficult to give up if we slept together again.

Am I avoiding getting involved? Am I scared? Am I scarred? Or did I just make a good decision, a normal, grown-up decision? Maybe it was just a dinner that was followed by an offer that I turned down. Is life ever that simple?

Anyway, tonight I'm watching Star Academy. It's mindless and stupid, and bad tv, but it's easier than dating.

8 commentaires:

Valleys Mam a dit…

if its not right its not right May be the mood was wrong , may be the gin was a factor, may be you were not in the right mood ,tierd what ever.
Sometime a man has to do what a man has to do -

Swearing Mother a dit…

You did good, Travelling. Getting picky, yes probably, but why not? If you're looking for THE one then maybe you don't need to confuse the issue with the ones that, however charming, are not for you.

Keep looking, he's out there somewhere.

Stew a dit…

Shit, I don't know.
I've been married for 20 years now, so I don't know shit from other stuff

Swearing Mother a dit…

Merry Christmas, Travelling.

Swearing Mother a dit…

And a Happy New Year

Stew a dit…

Allez! reveille-toi!

Hope you're not still hungover.

Valleys Mam a dit…

Blwyddyn newydd da i chi xxxxx
Was in your old stamping ground this week - nothing changes

Swearing Mother a dit…

Where the hell is that boy? Think it's time to send out the search party?